Oi You!

A few years ago we had a woman working for our company who was almost "allergic" to IT to say the least. It was ironic really as she was a tutor and taught IT for a living.

She could also be one of the rudest people you could meet, epecially if she had a technical problem.

One evening I was working a late shift and had the pleasure of two run-ins with her in less than an hour.

During the start of my shift I had to sort out an important meeting room, making sure everything was working and that the users could log on. This resulted in me going back and forth, if I needed parts or to reset users passwords etc.

On about the third trip I suddenly heard "oi you" behind me. Recognising the voice I grimmaced, and turned to face our favourite tutor, doing her best to be polite as usual.

"Printer's not working..!" She demanded at the top of her voice, her hands on hips, lips pursed.

Not at all impressed with being called "Oi" I took great delight in informing the woman that I was busy with something important (yes lady, more important than you,) and I would take a look at the printer as soon as I had finished.

It took me only 5 minutes to finish what I was doing, so half an hour later, I went to take a look at the printer. I walked in and immediately saw there were no lights on the machine.

As I entered the room, the woman started hopping around, clicking her fingers, shouting "oi" and telling me that the printer was not working and it wasn't good enough etc, the usual stuff.

I walked up to the printer and pressed the power button, the printer whirled to life and immediately started printing everything in it's queue. I silently turned and walked to the door shaking my head in disgust.

"HOW DID YOU DO THAT?" The woman demanded.

"I switched it on" I said at the top of my voice, so that everyone in the room could hear. There were a few chuckles.

"HOW DID YOU DO THAT?" She screeched in dispair as if it were a national secret that I was withholding from her.

"I pressed the BIG power button on the side. The one labelled 'Power.'" I told her and walked out, leaving the woman dumbstruck. Power buttons are obviously foreign objects where she comes from.

20 Minutes later, I finally get to sit down and I get a knock at my door.

"Oi you! Three screens are NOT working in at that room, it's disgraceful."

Still not happy with being referred to as "oi," I followed her grimmly back to the room and took a look at the monitors. Within seconds all three were blinking to life.

"HOW DID YOU DO THAT?" She wailed for the third time that evening.

Yep you guessed it...

"Well, I switched those two on and that one wasn't plugged in."

"Yes it was, I checked that." She cried indignantly.

I turned to the person sitting next to the computer. "Did I just plug that in?" I asked her.

"Yes" she said, nodding at her tutor.

"Thank you" I said "I thought I was going senile" and I left the room again.

 Obviously I am not the only one, it seems that they will employ anyone these days...